dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
