Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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