WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?