How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize