i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
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