You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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