I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I think a kid would responsible me up
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
