is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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