would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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