Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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