You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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