Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
