What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
