then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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