Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
