Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
