i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
