I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.