can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Randomize
