omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize