If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
