Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
