let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
