if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
