Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
