he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
