who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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