What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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