do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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