So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
You're earring is so big in my mouth
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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