I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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