Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize