if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
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