Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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