i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
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