Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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