3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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