Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
