Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
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