I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize