so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.