I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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