How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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