just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
