So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
this is an emotional support booty call
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
