Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
