don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
be right there i have to get my cape
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
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