My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
its liver damage thursday
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