And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
My ATM looks so different sober.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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