It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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