There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
